Tag Archive | Pain

Do you know why I like flowers?

Do you know why I like flowers?
Because they’re pretty and useless
Broken off from their roots
And falling apart day by day
Just like me

The effort of keeping the facade
Pretending normality while I’m panicking again
Falling apart
Pretty and useless

Loaded Question

Pain, Pain, Go away

Come again some other day

Actually, no.

Please, don’t come back

I hate being disabled.

I look so sturdy

I’m untempered glass

Wondering which hammers will fall

Nerves?

Joints?

Muscles?

That Damocles Sword named depression?

“How are you?” is a loaded question.

No one believes me anyway.

The Poetry Event

I took my shoes off
At the poetry event
Starry Night socks against a bare wooden floor

We leave early
She’s in pain tonight
A rare event for her
The poetry’s terrible tonight anyway

Clippings from my memory
A life filled with pains
My broken down body
Still, my socks felt good against the floor

The socks I'm referring to.

The socks I’m referring to.

Do you know?

content note: trans-misogyny, slurs

 

Do you know what it’s like to stand stone faced as your boss makes a transphobic joke and everyone laughs?

Do you know what it’s like to remain silent, because if you speak, you’ll scream obscenities at him and get fired?

Do you know what it’s like to work someplace where the most queer supportive person doesn’t give a damn about the discrimination you face and talks about eating at chik-fil-a?

Do you know what it’s like to be a thing? despised?

Do you know what it’s like to hold back tears, and keep working through your shift?

Do you know what it’s like to know that it doesn’t get better, that it’s only going to get worse?

Do you know what it’s like to be a stupid little tranny bitch?

Do you know?

Do you fucking know?

 

 

I’m gonna go cry now.

First time epilation

So, I just finished my first time using an epilator on my chest. Holy Mother of Fuck That Hurts.I’ve had 350°F frier oil shot into my face causing first and second degree facial burns. And this still is one hell of a painful experience for me. What makes it worse is that you are doing it to yourself intentionally. Fucking sweet zombie Jesus. I think I’m going to have to get a little drunk before I try doing my legs tonight. As someone who has had to deal with a whole lot of pain in her life, I will never understand people who enjoy it. If you are one of those people, hey, more power to ya, do what makes you happy as long as you have consenting partners.